2L: First Semester

Two ladies talking during the preview for Blood Diamond: "What country does that take place in? He sounds Australian, but why would the movie take place there? It looked like it had too much jungle to be Australia. Does Australia have jungle?"

Two ladies talking during the preview for Bobby: "You know what? I just found out that in the Kennedy family he was overlooked because he was the youngest son. But I never overlooked him." "Me neither."

"We considered making out, and he was up for it, but I thought not. I didn't want to get a runner in my pantyhose." -Stidd
"Are you calling him the runner now?" -Tony

"I think I'm allergic to beer. It's all vodka from now on. True story." -Josh

"Well aren't you just pissin on someone's pop-tart?" -Stidd

"I got closer to those guys watching the game and realized that they were drunk and yelling slurs about the other team's mothers." -Guy whose son went to DePauw
"Yep, that's Wabash for you." -Paulson

"Hey I was trying to help you out. If I really wanted to help you out though, I'd take that stupid hat off." -Sam

"I McForgot to put on McUnderwear." -Beth

"I don't need to Scotch Tape my ass together." -Beth

"Next week I'll be doing it." -Beth

"Oh My McShit!" -Beth

"The McBoy is busy." -Me
"McBUSY!" -Beth

"No you're the gatekeeper cause you have a hole." -Me

"I'm an obnoxious tool. Wait! It's my birthday!" -Beth

"That's just mean." -Sarah and I
"NOBODY said that!" -Beth

"Is it your bday?" -Beth
"No." -Guy
"Then I can't make out with you." -Beth

"You sound so sweet on the phone. Little do they know there's a python on the other end." -Graham to me

"It's ok. She didn't hear the first sentence because she wasn't paying attention." -Hannah
"It's ok, she does that to me too." -Paulson
"Yeah but when I do it to you, I do it on purpose." -Me

"You see how much I missed you? I haven't seen you in two days." -Me
"It was such a good two days." -Paulson
"I know b/c during those two days you fantasized about how nice I was to you and now you have to come back to reality. Fantasy is not ok. And I don't know when I started talking like this." -Me
"Maybe it's b/c you've been listening to French music." -Paulson
"I like to think of it as Freedom Music, not French." -Me

"Maybe you have botulism and you're paralized." -Paulson

"Natalie hasn't even had sex yet and she's already learning how to fake it." -Me

"I hate getting all those penis enlargement emails. Maybe I get them from going to all those porn websites." -Graham
"Well I don't get them because I don't go to those websites. But then Bone doesn't get them either." -Stidd
"That's because she's in the industry." -Graham

"If a guy's grandfather were on his death bed and you'd be like 'you wanna?' (have sex), he'd be like 'Meet me in the bathroom in 5 minutes and why don't you take off your panties now so I can put them in my pocket." -Amanda and Amelia

"Clothes: 3 point shot. Underwear: sign of theta." -Hendren

*makes motion of giving head* "It's a sin." -Hendren
"But that's why God made a mouth." -Court

"She still owes me 5 suckins." -Josh

"I usually bite some balls but only when they're shaven cause he likes to floss." -Court

"Shoot me, shoot me now." -Me
"No way. If I have to suffer, so do you." -Cristin

"Here's what I wrote to her: Thank you for your concern. When I want advice from the Man, I'll be sure to contact you." -Me
"Did you really write that?" -Paulson
"Yes." -Me
"That's awesome." -Paulson

"Yeah because I'm going to make so much money off of poor people that I'll be able to afford to make two payments." -Me
"You can make money off of selling poor people? I've been going about this all wrong." -Paulson
"Yes Paulson, you can make money off of selling poor people. I already sold you. Why do you think Jen married you?" -Me
"So that marriage certificate is my record of sale?" -Paulson
"No it's the title of property. And she wanted to be married badly because she paid much more than you're worth." -Me
"I'd hope so because I'm worth nothing." -Paulson

"I'll have a drink waiting for you." -Beth
"Drink waiting for me? We should get drinking now. You might as well pay for the cab fare to Hades." -Leen
"Yeah cause you're going to hell in a handbasket and we're going with you." -Me
"I am such an asshole." -Beth

"I'm sorry did you just say she has crabs?"-Me

"At our high school prom they wouldn't let us..." -Beth
"Have sex?" -Me
"No..."-Beth
"Oh they let you have sex?" -Me
"I love you but you're a bitch." -Beth

"Sometimes you have to be faster than the ass you're tapping." -Leen

"I'm an equal opportunity molestor." -Beth

"Go Tarts go places. Your Pop-Tarts don't." -Me
"That's probably the meanest thing anyone's ever said to me. You slut." -Beth

"Hey DePauw plates. Let's stalk you." -Beth
"It's probably some old guy." -Leen
*We pull up beside the car*
"It's Grable!!! GRABLE!!!"-Me

"I feel like it's looks as if I have a lazy eye." -Eileen
"Hey! Get a job you lazy eye!" -Beth

"You can hand yourself over the bar...did I just say that out loud?" -Me

"And on the 7th day God created Facebook and the animals stalked Eve and he had them smited? smitten? smoted?" -Beth

Writes on the sign-in sheet "BONE" -Paulson
"You're such a tool." -Me
giggles as his face turns red -Paulson

"I don't think a six and a half foot guy in an orange tie is the definition of subtle." -Alex
"Oh it absolutely is!! You can use the tie to swing out of here via a light fixture." -Me
"I'm not very graceful." -Alex
"We'll have George stand up on a table and dance to distract her." -Me
"I could never leave a sight like that." -Alex

"You're kinda nimble-y. Like a cat." -Brock to me

"It's like the Twilight Zone. I have no idea what's going on." -Paulson
"Do do do." -Me
"Consider if you will, two boobs. One named Sam. One named Bone." -Paulson

"Americans are famous for going into a country and raping their economy." -Alex
"Are you speaking as a Costa Rican?" -Prof. Bravo
"No, I'm speaking as an educated person." -Alex

"If we ever have one of those body-switching experiences, the first thing we're doing is oral sex on each other. I don't know why I said that." -Beth

"I don't think the sexy dance can be caught on film. It's as elusive as bigfoot, or in your case cripple foot." -Me

mrbuttons01: why did beth leave me :-(
Bethie121: because your texas girlfriend has hairrier legs than she and she's jealous?

mrbuttons01: bed-wrecker!!!!!!
Bethie121: lol i sho am
Bethie121: i take pride in the things i do well

"No you're a different kind of favorite. You're not my doing it favorite, you're my roommate favorite." -Beth

"Maybe she's going to be my sugar mama."- Pure
"No. I'm against prostitution. Actually, I'm for prostitution, just not with ugly people." -Me

"Well, I guess I should appreciate seeing you while you're here as you'll never be around."- Pitts
"I'll never be around? Out of the two of us, which is most likely to ditch his friends for a new girlfriend and never be around?" -Me
"I'm loving this conversation." -Cohn

"I'll let you whip me if I miss behave." -Lauren

"I'm suing Justin Timberlake. I'm the one who brought sexy back." -Lauren